My Heart Hurts. My Pride Hurts. I Have 2 Owies.

Sometimes I wish I didn't have feelings.
Well, I'm glad I have feelings, but I wish I didn't let them run my life.
I always find the good in people and block out things I probably shouldn't block out.
Then I end up sad.
I've been cheated on, I've been lied to, I've been ignored.
And every time - trusting and offering my all unconditionally.
I'm a small girl to have such a big heart.

Dorney

This cucumber came from someone's garden.

Cicciona.




I loved this kid's shirt but he kept hiding behind his dad. This was the best we could do. haha Awesome.

Hoagies and WaWa.

Nice Refreshing Glass of Water.

A few months ago, I was thrown into this whirlwind...a crazy whirlwind...no sleep, excessive drinking, new friends, walking the bridge, not showering for days at a time, not even being at my apartment for days at a time, not cleaning my apartment for months at a time - or doing laundry...being brave when I thought I couldn't, being honest when I thought I couldn't, realizing what I'm worth - no - confirming what I'm worth, waking up to handfuls of people and foreign objects in my apartment - waking up in dirty clothes and not remembering how I got home, spending money because I have it, hopping from party to party, going to work on an hour of sleep - and crying and praying first thing in the morning because I feel like death and can't focus my eyes, making plenty of bad decisions, and basically losing track of my life...and of myself. Just feeling totally grimey but loving it at the same time. I've always done everything right. I feel like I got caught up in it and now that my feet have finally had a chance to touch the ground, I've attempted to take a deep breath and sleep it off.

Sometimes you need a little vacation from your life. Occasionally I take these mini-vacations and stay with friends for the weekend. (Or have friends stay with me.) I especially like it because we have mini adventures. The only thing that's "mini" about these adventures is the time frame. (Usually between Thursday and Monday.) This time around, my adventures definitely started Thursday night and really still haven't ended, since I haven't been home yet. I think I was home for a few hours Saturday night and I've been away since.
It's not out of the ordinary, but this time has been different. It was like I hit the "reset" button. I feel secure, inspired, and motivated.
This is my life. I have to make it good.

I kinda feel like I'm secretly standing on the side of the road waiting to get swept up again.

I Lost My Poor Meatball When Somebody Sneezed.

I'm totally greasy today.
I haven't showered since Saturday before I left Philly.
Even I can't pull that off.

Hallelujah

Elvis has left the building.

More to come later....

Break Dance!

Love, Nay and Mamby

Craptacular.

Sometimes the most hurtful words are, "I think I just want to be by myself."

Fantastic.

D.U.F.F.

So I've been dieting for a week - and when I look back, I "cheated" a little more than I wanted to. Mostly last weekend. I've even been eating this nasty non-fat plain yogurt for breakfast. It's painful.
I haven't made any progress. I really want to look nice for Beth's wedding. Of the 3 bride's maids, I don't want to be the chubby one. :(

Bizaare. O. World.

Please explain to me what's going on here:




Apparently the elegance that emanates from these girls can be seen from across Union Square. They sat down next to me on the steps and this guy comes from behind me, hits me in the head with his bag, and goes straight for them, telling them how elegant they are and that he can tell by their outfits that they're not from New York. They're not. They're from Baltimore and apparently he's some famous photographer whose name I didn't catch. He kept going on and on about their style and how he doesn't see that anymore and he just has to take their picture because they're going in his book. One of these girls claims to be an actress, one claims to be a singer, and the other claims to be a model. They also claimed that people had been staring at them all day because of the way they're dressed.
All I can say is that I can shop at American Apparel, H&M, and Forever 21 too, where this sort of pre-packaged look is readily available. We all can. It's really not hard to capture that "Straight Out the Gallery Elegance".




I liked these girls because they had matching bracelets like Ana and me. Awwww.